Should i tell my fiance about my past and risk losing him?

I am engaged to a wonderful man. I should be the happiest woman in the world but it is the totally opposed. I have known my fiancé for 5 years. I am 23 years old now. We are planning to get married in two years.


My fiancé is an amazing man but he is VERY VERY short tempered. About two years ago, I met this latino guy. At first, he was my guy friend. He was telling me that he wants me to be his girlfriend but I never paid much attention. I used to see him and talk about logic, philosophy, religion etc. It felt good talking to him since he never got angry when I would disagree with him (unlike my fiancé at that time). So I started developing feeling for this guy. And I told him that I kinda of loved him. That is when this latino guy changed. He started calling me names. He turned into a total jerk. That is when I stopped seeing him. And I told my fiancé that there was this latino guy who hit on me and I swore to him on my future kids’ lives that I’ll never talk to that latino guy again. I kept my promise for five months but I was thinking of the latino guy every day. I missed the latino guy sooooooooooo much. Until one day, I ran into him and I couldn’t help but talking to him. He was talking as if he is so innocent and how I usually took my anger on him when I am so sick. I talked to him for three hours. I hated him and myself so much at that moment. For the first time ever, I can say, “I honestly don’t care about this guy anymore”. I stopped thinking of him and I truly moved on with my life. Keep in mind that I never kissed that latino guy, nor did I hug him.


However, I broke my promise to my fiancé. I told him that I the latino guy talked to me (the truth is I talked to him first, not the other way around). I also told my boyfriend that we only talked for two minutes. My fiancé was very upset but he forgave me.


Also three years ago, I let a couple of men flirt with me. Nothing happened (didn’t kiss them or hugged them) but I didn’t stop them from flirting with me. My fiancé doesn’t know about this.


We got engaged few days ago. I feel awful that I haven’t been totally honest with about my past. But I know if I told him, he’ll leave me right away and I truly love him. My question is should I tell him about my past and risk losing him?Should i tell my fiance about my past and risk losing him?
Looks like you have a hard time controlling your emotions. I think that you've been honest enough. Too much information if you dish all. If you are really ready to be married, then there is no good that can come out of telling him but ONLY ONLY ONLY if you are going to remain honest and faithful from the time you and he became engaged. All is fair, in love and war, until he put a ring on it!





Honestly, it seems like you may need to hang out with more women and not put yourself in potentially tempting situations. Good Luck and Congrats on your engagement, enjoy it!Should i tell my fiance about my past and risk losing him?
No, it was painful enough for me to just read all this, I can't imagine what hearing it would sound like!
EVERYBODY loves to be flirted with doesn't mean you cheated
YES


THEN U CAN LET GO
be honest.
People flirt! There is nothing wrong with it. You did nothing wrong, but I have to say, you shouldn't marry a guy with a short fuse and an anger problem. The latino guy has the same personality.


Why are you after men like this? I wouldn't marry either of these guys, if I were you. You are being too hard on yourself. I'm sure your fiance has flirted with other women too.
You said this just 3 months ago:





';So, I kept chatting to that Latino guy even though this Latino man kept making fun of me. I stopped talking to him four months ago; the problem is I still think about him from time to time even though I have never met him in person. I am really not sure what to do.';











Not sure what your trying to play here, but your way too immature to get married and maybe you should just start fresh with someone else....your one confused chick.
Be honest and grow up. You sound immature and like you dont know what you want. You shouldnt have agreed to marry him when you cant be honest. You are sick for knowing that latino guy liked you and then telling him you kind of love him! Who does that?? Figure out what you want, be honest with yourself and your fiance and save everyone heartache and trouble
Theres something called ';life before marriage'; and we all have/had one. Talking to someone is not exactly earth shattering and you say nothing happened so why start trouble over something as petty as this and risk the chance of losing Mr Wonderful? Forget it as it really isnt worth the trouble here. Now if you cant live with yourse;lf because of something really stupid, then by all means tell him but you will regret it when you can just shove this into the skeleton closet and move on. Seriously, this really isnt that big a deal to lose someone over. Move on
If you truly loved him, you would never have put yourself in the position to feel guilty. If you can't be totally honest with him, you have no business going thru with an engagement/wedding.





On a seperate topic, if he has a short temper, is this your ideal partner for life?
When you said PAST, I thought you meant something concrete, not this silly stuff (no offense). If he'd leave you over guys flirting with you, that's ridiculous. There is no reason to tell him every single little thing, I mean that sort of thing is meaningless, and certainly not cheating or anything.
You need to give the ring back and take some time to grow up. Right now you are attracted to guys who are bad for you.





The latino guy has a bit of a temper too and I have no doubt he would screw your socks off before walking away. He don't want you forever, he wants to use you and he is a jerk.





You can't talk to your fiance about anything because if you disagree he gets angry.





Don't throw away your life. Find a guy who is really into you. Not just for sex but for all of you. Both of those guys are poor choices if you want to be happy.
If you did not know right from wrong you would not feel the guilt you are feeling. In my personal opinion ? I think that what he doesn't know isn't going to hurt you. But you really need to make some changes in your life ! Especially if you want to keep the present boy friend.


Just try and remember that just because you do not tell all you have not gotten away with everything ! It could still come full circle and bite you in the a$$
Um I don't see what you are stressing over. You did not do anything but talk to this guy. Everyone has thoughts of, or feeling toward others during the course of a relationship. The truth is there is nothing you did that would jeopardize that. Talking is not cheating and neither is flirting.