Monday, August 16, 2010

MEN ANSWER, PLEASE: Do you think it's ok for a married man to flirt with young women and use sexual innuendo?

My husband has given up a lot of very hurtful behaviors (such as checking out every female in the store or restaurant while I'm with him, and openly flirting with women as if I were not even in the room). He's made a lot of progress understanding how hurtful that was. Recently he let a young woman know that her constant bending over to expose her boobs was funny (this, after he told me she was a ';whore';). Am I naive in thinking he has changed or does he just have me fooled. What degree of flirting is acceptable for a married man in the presence of his wife? I don't even have people over anymore because I just got so sick of his behavior.MEN ANSWER, PLEASE: Do you think it's ok for a married man to flirt with young women and use sexual innuendo?
Oh, wow, was that how he first got your attention?


I wouldn't do that. So NO, I don't think it's OK.





';What degree of flirting is acceptable for a married man in the presence of his wife?';





I don't think any degree of flirting is acceptable for a married man, whether the wife is present or not. It's not just hurtful, it's also very degrading. Especially if the women he flirts with know that he's married. What would they think? That his marriage is a joke?





add:


Imo, ';talking about other people's physical attraction'; (even with the initial ';staring in amazement'; that sometimes unavoidable) is not the same as ';flirting';.


You can't help it if your head turns toward girls in scanty outfits, but you have the option not to flirt.MEN ANSWER, PLEASE: Do you think it's ok for a married man to flirt with young women and use sexual innuendo?
All people are different. My husband and are both very secure in our marriage and relationship and don't mind discussing the physical attractiveness of other people with each other. Purposeful flirting would be something else entirely.





But in this case, it sounds like you definitely are not happy with it, which means it's too much. As long as you are both not seeing eye to eye on this, it will damage the relationship, so you need to talk with him seriously about this.
Wasn't he like this before you married? My mother married a man like this and she knew he was like this BEFORE they married but still married him and keeps getting into fights over the leering and the flirting. I think for some men this is how they are and it's almost instinctual for them to look and flirt and hard for them to change this behavior. You have to be a very secure and trusting woman to be with a man like this or it will forever cause problems.





Every relationship has different discussed and understood boundaries. For my husband and I NO degree of flirting is acceptable but we knew this about each other when we first started dating. For some couples I encounter they will openly discuss how beautiful a girl is they see and flirt openly with people and the spouse just laughs along. So every relationship is different.





edit: btw I find his flirting disrespectful and insensitive to you and I would not take that if he was my spouse but then again I would never find myself married to such a person.
I feel that depends on how secure YOU are and what kind of a relationship you have with your husband. No matter what ANTONE on here tells you it is going to be wrong. Only YOU can decide what you will take and when you have had enough. Go talk to your husband about this not strangers on a web site. If that is not enough for you then you need to reevaluate your marriage...
Zero. I would NEVER flirt with another woman. But do it in front of my wife. Are you kidding. I love her too much. And I fear her a bit. This is just so wrong. And if a younger woman flirts with me (which is rare - luckily for me) I just don't respond at all. And they stop right away because it is embarrassing to do it when the other person is not repsonding at all. 20 years married
No it is not okay for him to be flirting especially with you there. That just shows how immature he is. sounds to me like he has not changed and just has you fooled. You do not need to stand for that If he doesn't change then leave his ***. You probably deserve allot better treatment than what you are getting.
Hoiw about no degree of flirting? All flirting becomes is a way of telling your SO that theyre not good enough. So theyre adevrtising for somethign better. Anyone who negatives this or says flrting is ok is a cheater. Do a search in Yahoo Answers for ';flirt';, you'll find a lot of groundswell against it.
My dad was a big flirt like that. My mom told him that someday she wont care if he keeps it up.. He finally cheated and they were geting a divorce when he died. This is not okay behavior and he needs to stop or I would leave. If you have kids this is a bad roll model.
Hell no its not ok.





He is disrespecting you and your marriage by doing this.





You need to have a very serious talk with him and tell him that if he doesn't stop this sh*t that you are going to leave and not come back until he straightens up.
These questions just keep getter more stupid.





American women, you are embarassing your country.





If you don't get a grip on a sense of morals and values, and learn how to land a good man, then just let the Canadian women take over, eh!!!!!!!!!!!
I HAVE THE SAME ISSUES YOU JUST EXPLAINED!!why do guys never notice how much it hurt us as their wives to see them attracted to a woman that clearly looks nothing like the women they have decided to spend their lives with! what a slap in the face!
Married men tend to flirt a little. But i think what he is doing is total disrespect for you. Let him know how you feel
All flirting is ok for a married man. He's married - it's the only fun he has.
For a married man this is not right at anytime, either with or without your presents.


Good Luck
then you have to change to .. hes given up to your demands .. cut him some slack. as well.. .. as you said hes trying .. .. its time you cut him free ..
Thank God your husband is strong.





I was weak and this 18 yr old girl so fine just gave me a little too much attention and when she wanted me all the way..I said, damn, I'm screwed.
He should not do it if you don't like it
a leopard never changes its spots love.
I agree with you,he is sick,he should not be doing that stuff at ALL,except with you.
noo its not ok
sounds like he is real jerk!
Thats not good, but I use this crazy technique sometimes to get my wife to click up in her head and stir up a little bit of jealousy. So that way, she knows what she has and it really works on my end. Like for example, the other day I was fixing my lawnmower outside the front porch and this extremely fine young very attractive woman comes up to me, very close too comfort, asking me that she is a make up artist to put on fine quality makeoever make up on my wife. So I tell her, that my wife is very busy right now to come up to the front door and that she can try coming tommorrow. So this pretty make up artist female, very sensual, very sexy keeps coming over and over to my home several times and my wifes knows, she is extremely pretty, always asking for her. But once again my wife is always busy inside the house cleaning and doing chores. That's when my wife SNAPS, CLICKS up in her head, ';that nobody -no other woman will steal my husband';. Because of this she now pays closer attention to me and performs better a night time. This really did spice up the long time marriage. I never thought that a extremely beautiful attractive woman coming over to my house, would cause such a effect to my long time marriage. It really improved it dramatically.
The only rules are the ones you make together. If you don't like it, talk to him about it. He should respect your feelings and be willing to at least compromise. He's going to look, and he's going to think about all the wild animal ******* and sucking he could be getting from the tittywhore. Don't expect to have control over his mind, but do expect him to have control over how he expresses or hides those thoughts.





When engaging in extramarital relationships, I always make sure to show deference and respect to my wife and her feelings. He should at least be able to do that, even with her lips around his shaft. No point to being rude and stuffing it in your face.
let me ask you (and any other wives out there): when was the last time you teased your husband and bent over and flashed your boobs? when was the last time you were at your seductive best? how often do you flirt with him?





the reasons guys will always look at girls doing that and respond to them is because IT IS FUN. IT IS SEXY. IT IS PLAYFUL. for most guys if their wife keeps that up after marriage they will be content. if you dont then cant you see how we (guys) will be attracted to that?





some days life is a bi**h. anything that diverts your attention form that is welcomed. if you are the one doing it for him then you probably dont have any reason to worry. if you're not you should worry and ask yourself why YOU arent the one teasing and taunting him and making him think about you.
You said men but I am answering anyway.


A smart married man will not do any of that if he wants to stay married.


That is unacceptable for a couple dating, too.


If my husband did that I would knock the hell out of him and leave. (have done that before in a restaurant, but came back to eat the food.) He apologizes if he slips again....or says horrid things and we go nowhere together.


No degree of flirting is acceptable in front of a wife or even behind her back. (without her there.)
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